Tag Archive | beautiful

Happy Valentine’s Day

You make my life beautiful…..

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My goldie – when I say you as gold, I know for sure that I can’t buy you with what I have and I mean that you are really precious for me to hold and not to miss you for any reason as well. Most of the time we meet people by chance but meeting you and being with you is a choice given by you in a unique way. Especially when I was depressed with the way things were going around me. Being hurt by someone and being in love again with someone is not an easy task in anyone’s life, but even before coming out of the tragedy, you entered my life like a rocket and removed the sorrow of being hurt in your own way.

When I was about to lose my faith in love, you entered my life as a promising faith of love. Is it divine love? I don’t know what is divine love, but you are the most amazing love of my life. Success of my life is holding the love, but that success is holding you now as her strength of love. BE with me forever or leave me never or leave me when I leave this world.

Thank you for making that beautiful difference in my life..

You made me to feel that sharing everything is not as easy as I was thinking by sharing each and every small thing with me. It is really not possible for me to share in minute detail… only thing you have not told is that you breath 72 times for a minute and it is 80 now, it is less now 🙂

It is not a note to say thanks to you but I have to say thanks to you for making my life wonderful in so many ways especially managing my rudeness, my arrogant love, my adamant love for you. At times I used to think what is the purpose of life, now I know that my purpose of life is to love you and live for you. (Even thought we are not together, you live with me, I live with you and our every second goes together)

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I know our relationship doesn’t need any thank you’s but when we say thank you to each other, it really matters and this thank you means a lot to me baby because I owe that much to you my sweet darling.

I have thanked you on some special occasions; we both know it how special those moments are and the way it was said has got immense faith and love for you.  I have to thank you every day for the wonderful difference what you have given in my life and making my life so beautiful.  Life would have been so miserable without you and I mean this.. Thank you for making my days brighter and nights cooler as like you. I cherish every moment of our togetherness and wish it to go till my life ends.

Now we can’t imagine a life without each other and that is the reason that you are so special to me yesterday, today, tomorrow and forever. I can’t imagine how life would have been if you have not entered my life.

I said I will get lot of wishes on this day, but today, when I am alone without you, I realize that your wishes only means a lot to me. I realize your importance and the difference what we have in our life. Without my thoughts there will not be single minute going for you and similarly all my time goes around you.

I really want to apologize for my arrogance and it is sincere apologies from the heart. I should not behave so violently/vehemently for the one who makes my day and night so lovely, beautiful, warm and cool. You are my sunshine and the moon light.

I have seen some good friend’s love, care in my life, but wish that this should be my best and forever love of life. I love you from you means a lot and when you say that I love you, only for you makes me to feel that I am blessed. I really love you is a delight to hear and the feeling of love is always on top of the sky and your love makes me to fly. 

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Happy Valentine’s Day for making my life the most beautiful …. I don’t think something else can come in my life to feel that is going to be beautiful as I feel that I am in heaven when we are together. I want to scream and say that I love you loosu naaye….

With ton’s love, with Eyes full of Tears, Heart full of Prayers comes a warm wishes for you to get well soon and to be with me forever and I promise you that I will be with you forever without breaking your heart.

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HAPPY VALENTINE’s DAY MY LOVE

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Madly in Love

ஊர் என்னைச் சுற்றி நின்றாலும்

இந்த உலகம் சுழல்வது நின்றாலும்

உன்னை மட்டுமே

என் மனது சுற்றுகிறது!!

விழி திறந்தும் உன்னை கண்டேன்

விழி மூடியும் உன்னையே கண்டேன்

விழித்து இருந்தும் உன்னையே கண்டேன்!!

இது என்ன மாயமோ

அன்பே

எனது உலகம்

எப்போதுமே அழகு தான்

இன்று உன்னாலே

நானும் அழகானேன்!!!

i love u-deeply

Whether the state stands by my side

or the world stops rotating

my heart go around you & only for you
I am seeing you when my eyes are open,

I am seeing you when my eyes are closed,

I am seeing you without you in person

Alas, I don’t know what is this magic moment

My Love,

My world is always beautiful,

but I look more beautiful because of you…..

மங்கையின் துணிவு

CONFIDDENT WOMAN

என் வாழ்க்கையின்

வசந்தமென வர விரும்பினேன்

உன்னை, அவஸ்தைகள்

படபோகிறாய் என்று வேறு திசை

நோக்கிச் சென்றதனால்

பேதை இவள்  வாழ்வுதனை

முடித்துக் கொள்வாளோ??

இல்லையடா நான் வாழ்ந்து

அன்பாலே உலகை வெல்வேன்

அதன் மூலம்

என்னுள் இருக்கும்

உன்னை கொன்றுவிடுவேன் …!!!

என் வாழ்க்கை

கல்லும் முள்ளும்

இல்லாத பாதை

அல்லவே

அழகிய பாதையாக நீதான்

வரவேண்டும் என்று இருந்தேன்

இடையே இதுவல்ல

என் பாதை என்று

திசை மாறிட

எப்படி இரும்பாய் இருகிறாய் நீ ??

வேதனை என்னவென்று

விலங்கிடுமுன் வேள்வியாய்

பிறந்தவள் நானாடா !

உன்னை காதலித்த பின்

புரிந்து கொண்டேன்

எனது தவறு என்னவென்று

எந்தன் காதலது

கருமேகம் அல்லவே

நீ சென்றதும்

காற்றினில் கலைந்து போக !

இதயத்தில் எழுதியதில்லை

செதுக்கியது,

காலங்கள் பல ஆனாலும்

காதல் அழிவதில்லை

அழிவு என்பது

காதலர்களுக்கு மட்டுமே

உடலும் உயிரும் அழியலாம்

உணர்வுகள் அழிவதில்லை ! ! !

My SAD – Miss you

This is a special thank you for the one whom I lost without knowing the reason…

Thank you for entering my life. Thank you for being Unique. Yet one more day thinking that you are not far away from me.

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I used to tell you when I used to miss during the weekends or during our vacations that missing you makes me to feel more love for you. I don’t know may be because of that only you left me forever to love you more and more.

When we lose our loved one in the name of death, it is painful, but when we lose the dearth one without knowing the reason is more painful.

Many May come and Many may go, but the way I miss you can’t be measured by words. I keep myself so busy and I love two more like you, but still the pain in my heart is so much. I don’t think it can be repaired by anyone. I have one who will make me so happy with her presence and the other is like my Shakti, who will bring in all the powers even at the time of my deadly hours.

There is a saying that if someone hurts in the name of love, we need the same person as medicine.  I tried different medicines, but the pain of missing you is increasing rather than reducing. I tried to find my peace with a Sorry message, immediately, your sorry greeting card came into my life. I shared it in my Facebook wall and everyone started asking me to whom you are saying sorry, I was not able to tell them that this is a lovely sorry I got from you without knowing the reason for it.

There are some people who come for a reason and who leaves without any reason only. But your entry in my life has shown me a new phase in my life.

Life is as usual beautiful but if you are there in my life then it is the most beautiful place in this earth. As you have become my world, I am unable to search where you are as the place doesn’t matters, but the person matters.

will not return-stil waiting

Few of my friends asked me, do you still wish her and think about her?

Just because we don’t talk doesn’t mean that I hate her or I don’t care about her. I do care about her and love as I did before.

Do you think she reads your blog?  For sure, I know she will read it. If so, she would have responded to your messages, love or at least a word to know about you. It is not that she hates me, even if she hates me, she will read my blog and she will know that I am good, that is enough for her. As the way I say that I love her, she will also.

Sometimes, we forgive people simply because we still want them in our life, I want her in my life, if not as she was, at least as my dream daughter. I love her the most for making me to feel the most precious love of life. I have got all the happiness only because of that feeling what I got it through her. Only the doors of her heart is closed, but not the doors of my heart. I can’t knock it, but she has all the rights to break mine.

We don’t need communications through words. I am doing it to show it to her, even I wish to hear from her, but when I don’t get any news about her, god shows it to me in my dreams.

You will not believe also that I miss you more and more… now a days I dream a lot about you. What is a big thing in dreams? I am a day dreamer and I will not dream when I am asleep, but now you are coming in my dreams when I am in my deep sleep. It is new for me.

You know the way you came in my dream and told that I am going to be in Abu Dhabi. I was walking very fast in a Mall, suddenly I felt that I saw you and there was an eye contact with you, I came back to see is it you, yes it was you and there was drop of tears in your eyes and suddenly I got up from the sleep with tears in my eyes. It looks cinematic, but it is fact that I saw the tears in your eyes.

I don’t know whether this dream will become true or not, but I wish it to happen. I miss you the same way I was missing you in 2012 my dear SAD. Is it possible for you to make me SMILE once again ? Will this year 2015 bring that SMILE back in my Life?

Jayalalitha

Being a female chauvinist, I love, adore the women who excel in their profession.

Jayalalitha –> She is one of my best favorite Leaders from India, a charismatic, dynamic, energetic, vibrant leader. I am so happy to write about her when she is the Chief Minister of Tamil Nadu.

I still remember that I have slapped one of my friend in school when I was in 7th Standard for speaking ill about Jayalalitha. After slapping her, I told you have all the rights to talk about anyone anywhere but not in front of me. This slap will continue again. Before this incident I was very quite silent girl in school, but after that entire classroom started looking at me as like a revolutionary girl.

Before her entry into the politics, I admire her as an actress and I love to watch her daring performances in her movies. She has done different characters and not the stereo type heroine roles.

I love her not only as an actress but also for her knowledge and the stylish English. As a working female, I know how difficult it is to survive in this male chauvinism world. I admire her for doing the dare-devil roles in the movies against big stars and the way she used to do was awesome was the reason to love her acting.

The way she entered in politics I don’t know whether it was fate or luck or what, and the introduction of herself as a political heir by MGR founder of the AIADMK who was very successful in his political affairs. To my knowledge the authority was given by MGR to her as a political heir before he went for his treatment to US.

When I look back to write about her from what I know, I feel that she has carried her so beautifully in her political carrier. I feel that she was so powerful and became as a threat to opposition parties even before becoming the chief minister of Tamil Nadu. If the accidents and incidents faced by her would have been faced by any other normal lady would have made her to quit from politics. She is really a revolutionary leader as per the calling by the Tamilians as Puratchi Thalaivi and has the guts to face this all alone. I feel that she feels that the place was given by late MGR as a responsibility and she wanted to carry the party on her shoulder to make it live as per the faith of MGR.

To survive in the politics, we need the lot of energy and guts. Especially as a female and that too from the film industry she needs more courage to withstand the conspiracies that comes on her way. When she entered the politics she was new and she was about to compete with leaders who has spent their whole life in politics.

The main reason for my admiration is only because of her guts and the dynamism what she has shown towards leading the party.

I love many filmy personalities and for no reason I will wait to see them or to take an autograph of them, but to meet Jayalalitha in person, I waited to see her on road for more than 12 hours in 1991 and unfortunately because of security reason she didn’t come and I went home with tears when I was just 16 years.

When I think about it after 22 years I am feeling that I missed a great opportunity because I would have been in the Dias on that day and that would have been the best day of my life. I have seen her once infront of AIADMK office but that was not close.

Why I adore Jayalalitha?

Is she is the only female in politics, why not others? I have many leaders in my mind but not as like as JJ. There are many women who are as female leaders and even served the states as Chief Minister for their states. But they all have not seen the political life as so miserable so far in the Indian history. Even after the arrest, scam, scandals, Jail entry, adopted son marriage etc., she has the power and guts to face the public and to ask for the votes.

I got serious interest into politics because of Jayalalitha and I lost that interest also because of her. As my expectation out of Jayalalitha was more and the controversies scam, scandals killed my interest in politics.

As a Female I loved to see JJ as a strong leader of India, but somehow it didn’t happen. In the history of Indian politics, politics is always said to be dirty and no one is perfect, when it is for our betterment we choose the better one to rule us and not the best one to protect  and give us the best environment to live our life peacefully.

Happy Birthday to Puratchi Thalaivi, I wish to have a peaceful and happy life for one and all.

It is neither a tribute nor a dedication, as I can write a book about my love and inspiration and about JJ’s political entry, growth, sustainability, proactive measures, etc., not only like, but dislikes also will be in the list. This is just to say something about a lady whom I love, adore and worship for the way she has portrayed and excelled in her endeavors.

If at all there is a wish which has less chance to get fulfilled in my life is to meet her in person and to take a photograph with her. As like a normal fan of her acting, I will feel not to miss watching any of her movies, but as great fan of her as a strong leader my wish is to meet her personally…. I believe in the quotes “Man proposes and God disposes”… if it has to happen it will…

Motherhood

Motherhood is a divine emotion, an incomparable feeling. A mother shares the most beautiful and strongest bond with her child. It makes any female the happiest person on the earth, though there are many forms in which happiness comes to us but this one is with prodigious duty. This is a responsibility and not a burden but a sweet concern and very beautiful feeling of taking care, giving care, guiding the kid, making the kid to feel that they are in the safe hands.

BEING a mother is the most beautiful emotion in the world. I thanked you so many times for giving such a wonderful feeling. It is something that has to be felt. You have not come from my womb but so strong in providing that feeling, even now when I type this tears flow from my eyes.

These are not tears my love, these are the blood which I should have shed it. No matter how hard I try, I can never describe it in words. The bond between a mother and her child is the most lovely and strongest bond.

mother advice

I can’t make you understand what I felt for you or with you with words because it is a beautiful relationship. It is so hard for me to make someone understand it with words. Only those who have felt such kind of relationship can understand it and feel it.

My Life got changed completely when I considered you as a Kid. You know me that I have been the most fearless and confident person, someone who is always ready to take a risk but suddenly I started feeling scared and nervous about almost everything. Of course every child will make their mothers a weak personality, it is not emotionally weak, and it is a sense of responsibility and to provide the child all the happiness of the world.

I was never sure if everything I was doing is enough and I never felt was it over or is it all right. I was nervous all the time, what if I did something wrong to you or whether I am showing the right care for you or is it hurting you or are you feeling it as I feel or taking it wrongly or there were 1000 things going on in my mind.

It was not because that I considered you as my kid, because I shared what I felt with you and sharing that feeling with you has given me more responsibility to handle it carefully. By all means I don’t want to hurt you because of my feeling towards you. I became my biggest critic.

Of course I never felt happy with material things. But it is with the love from my surroundings, but the way I was feeling happiness because of you, words can’t just explain it, how it was because it is something divine. I realized that joy doesn’t come from material things only because of you my dear.

I might spend thousands of rupees to buy something for myself or for others but one smile from you made me the happiest person on the earth. There’s something divine about it. The way I got the ring from you, no one in the earth can make me so happy like that. Only I know how happy I was and I was praying to god please take my life this moment because I am so happy and I don’t want any more happiness in my life. Have you given that ring as gift to your boy-friend or with some stupid intention?

Only problem with me was I don’t want you to feel low either because of me or because of any reason. No matter how low I was feeling, one smile and your spirits will make it high again. Your smile became the best thing in my life.

With your smile I used to feel that all my worries vanished  and started to feel worrying for one thing that I should not give any hurt to you. I was so careful in showing my love and care to you especially because you are not a kid and a matured lady. May be the more I was careful, I gave the hurt to you but it was not knowingly and certainly it was unknowingly only. I don’t tell lies and I don’t care about anyone to tell the truth. To tell the lies only I have to think and remember everything, to tell the truth I don’t need to think about anyone and anything.

I never know that you will make me so stupid and not to feel that the only reason for me to hold you is to hear that you are happy and with your words I used to feel that you are happy or not and your smile will bring more happiness in my life.

The way you avoided me, if I would have considered you as a friend, I would not have given a room for you to enter into my circle of friendship because neither you deserve my friendship nor do you know what is friendship? You have never been cordial with anyone that is what I hear about you from your colleagues.

Your smile has given me inner strength inside me that I never thought I had. I know for sure that no one could give me that feeling in future because you destroyed my love and care. I felt that I have the energy and strength to look after you like a mother all your needs throughout the day.

During March-12, I went to India to find out the formalities to do the adoption, as soon as I came back Anantha asked me why not you fill the form now itself so as you will get the kid as soon as possible. Do you know what my response was, I told him that if I do it now, I will not be able to enjoy this great feeling and I will not be able to be true to both of them. Let me enjoy this feeling and let her give birth to her kid, and then I will go for it.

Even if I adopt a kid, I will not have that feeling now and I will have a fear only. Going for adoption is my 20 years dream and I have to fulfill it but now everything has become like a dream. How many sleepless nights I had with such high feeling for you and you destroyed it so cheaply with one word. Huh what kind of person you are my dear? I really feel ashamed to say that you are 26 years old woman who is feeling so much to become a mother. Do you know the difference between a mother and a boyfriend?

When I was there and asked you whether you had food or not, you never felt it differently or you wanted my friendship for something else. To support your boss officially to get information from me what we feel and think or something strange reasons?

I never had any feeling or felt like crib about not being able to give time to myself or about not being able to sleep well or to spend time with my friends, but still I loved every minute of my time spent with you and I can’t get that feeling for anything in the world.

Do you think I am lonely and I spend my time with you for time pass? I enjoy each and every minute of my life living lonely and I don’t pretend that I am happy. I have told you many times, I shared my wonderful time with you not to to hurt you or to get hurt. I have shared my time which I was supposed to spend with my family, friends, philosophers, my playing time, reading time, writing time, relaxing time… I don’t want my love and care what I have given you. Can you give back all the time what I have spent with you and because of you in pain now?

Normally mothers want to make the world a better place for their Kids. I don’t know what you know about motherhood or what you have learnt from your surroundings.

I have seen only the best mother and what all a mother can do for their kids. I have been brought up by a great mother and I have seen more motherliness from the people around me (My mom’s sister, granny, Gee)

They all used to protect me like a Kid even at this age from all the evil things. They are ready to fight against all the odds to make me happy and even now trying their best to make me happy. The way I have shown it to my cousin sister’s daughter, When I go to see the kid, even her mother-in-law will say, she is here, let her be with her daughter, we all will go. That is my love for each and every one and the respect what I have got from my second level of relatives is also so great for me.

The moment you become a mother, hope you will start respecting the motherliness and I pray for it to happen soon. I started loving my mother when I felt her sacrifices and the way she has done everything for me and I started respecting her even more after having the feeling of you as my kid.

All the things whatever she has done to me and my sisters are so huge. I used to think about this every day and I wonder how my mother has done so much sacrifice and was feeling how can I ever repay her for the sacrifices she made for me.

I used to feel that I will be doing it with my adopted kid and ideally I should have done all of it with the one who is going to be in my life and as my life. I have to show the entire love what I have experienced, learned and got from my mother and surroundings. I tried to do the same with you which was my biggest mistake.

I always say that my mom is the best mom in the world (Everyone will say that) but have I done enough for her? Will I be as good a mother as she is? I used to always tell her that mom, we don’t want to do anything more than what you have done to us. We want to give what you have given to us as a mother to our kids.

Unfortunately I didn’t give a chance for myself to have my own, but for sure the one who will come in my life will have all of it as the blessings. The one deserving will enter my life for sure.

Will I be as good a mother as she is? I think this is something every woman will ask herself when she becomes a mother. It makes you realize how much your mom loves you and what she really means to you and how much care she has taken in your growth.

It’s only then that you realize that the bond between a mother and child is the most unbreakable bond in the world. You are the only one who can break the beautiful relationship also. Of course it was my mistake that I felt such a great feeling through you.

Nobody can come between a mother and her child. I have shown it to the entire world when everyone around me and you wanted to say something against you or in favor of me to identify your real color, I have not allowed anyone to do for which I am paying the huge price.

A child becomes her mother’s universe and a mother becomes the child’s universe. May be I was wrong to think you as my world but yes it was wrong if you were not aware of it. I am lucky to have the feeling for you.

Whatever colors you have shown, may be god has given me this as a punishment for sharing my love and care with you. I would have been very happy not to hear even a single word bad about you and I would have been the happiest to die without  hearing anything bad about you. But god made me to hear everything, witness everything and made me as a reason from your mouth is more painful than the death of a kid. I am killing my self each second and feeling this as punishment from god.

Even after all your ill feelings, bad thoughts, arrogant attitude, immature character, playful behavior  I was feeling so nice about you and When I see a sweet kid in front of my eyes in the lift or on the road or in any mall, I used to feel if she has a kid like this, how it will be and a drop of tear comes out of my eyes and makes me to feel so bad with all your actions. At that point I have to curse you, but I will bring in a smile to myself and say you are a stupid, don’t think for her, think about yourself. I never got such a feeling with a small beautiful kids to think as my kids.

At last not the least, every mother would have slapped their kids, scolded their kids, cursed their kids but it is not to hurt them or to spoil them. It is all to make them in the right way. It happened with me as well. My mother has given beatings with broom sticks, whatever she gets in her hand, because I was so naughty, careless, rude and very arrogant.

I have the moral responsibility as a friend to correct him/her. I used to do it with everyone, if I feel that they are wrong. Your religion also says that don’t avoid people for their mistakes, and don’t afraid to correct them. It is your moral responsibility to inform them that what they are doing is wrong. It is their choice to take it or leave it.

I have done it on the road for one of my friend’s sister who was talking to a guy and scolded her on the road and said I will not scold next time, I will slap you on the road for doing such kind of activity. I know for sure that she has not taken it as like you and she is happily living and shown me her two kids recently when she met me in a park and said I married the same guy only see him he is there.

I considered you as my daughter and when I said those little harsh words to you to change your character is just to make you aware that you need to become lovelier so as you can make your child to feel that your heart is the place of heaven for her or him to dwell in. I was not wrong at all. Even then I asked sorry to you because it caused pain to you. You were not ready to analyze your mistake but you were keen to find out others mistakes.

How could you damage it with a silly word of saying it as a boyfriend? If I would not have shared it to you or if you are unaware of my feelings for you, then I can say that you can feel it as a crap or anything. What did I do as like a boyfriend to you? I am really annoyed with this word. Those guys around me are also friend only to me and how can you use these kind of cheap words?

Whatever it is all these are the answers for your husband’s question and if you have the guts share it and answer to my questions. I really hate someone to interfere in between my friends and you know what you are, tell them I gave them respect it is only because they are part of your life (Boss and your husband).

Let God show the great feeling of motherhood to you so as you will realize what you have done with me. This is not a curse, and it is a heartfelt wishes only… you will not know the difference between a wish and a curse also because you are a silly person with no feelings.

Over Pain

Love is painful only when it is not shared perfectly or properly. Love is more painful when we share it to a wrong person or when we share it to the one who don’t deserve it

Love is a game for you, and without knowing what it is, if you play, it will hurt not only others, it will hurt you as well. I took all the pains from week 1 till today. Unknowingly and knowingly I too have given some pains to you. I am sorry for it. I really mean it. I don’t have any grudges but I have the pain. All the pains I have given is because the pain what I have gone through is over the limit.

OVER PAIN made me to give those pains to you.  

I can define what is over pain to you my dear.

Over Pain is something which you can’t bear it. When you control all your emotions not to hurt the other person, there will be a limit and when it crosses more than that and since they suppress all their emotions, it will burst out and they can’t control it. It is like the Earthquakes and Valcanoes. Funny I gave over love to you and I got the gift of over pain from you…

Unknowingly – I gave this Pain to you.

When your father was sick, I scolded you badly saying that I don’t want to listen your crap, you don’t know the meaning of life and death. Did I speak for my father’s sake? He is your father and you only sent the message that he is having chest pain from morning, I may need to take him to hospital after IFTAR, pray for him. After reading this message anyone who has a heart will say bloody idiot take him immediately to the hospital.

When I read your message and tried to call you, you didn’t pick the call and all of us (my team) were worried about your father. Why we have to worry for him? Neither we know him nor have we seen him. It is basic courtesy when a person is suffering from heart problem, immediate attention is required. You will take him to hospital after 2 hours and because of your carelessness nothing should happen for him. I would have felt the same even with my enemy also. You were not my enemy that time, how do you want me to react my dear wow fantastic, what a love you have for your father. Great may your Allah bless you because you all kept the fasting and waited for IFTAR. Do you want me to praise you like this? Luckily nothing happened to your father, if he would have got sudden attack or something negative would have happened, I have to kill myself for keeping quite??

It is not because your father, this is humanity and you will not know what is humanity because you were able to sit and pray at home.

I don’t know what for you bought the ring for me and gifted it and the above incident happened within two days and I scolded you with all my love and in a feeling that you are mine. When I can take your gift as token of your love and do you think I don’t have any rights to scold you? I have to scold you at that moment only not after 10 days or 20 days. What did I ask you, you will do the same thing with everyone?

In Love people have all the rights to scold you, correct you, warn you, irritate you, if required to slap you also. How you will know this na? Neither do you know to love nor to give respect to others. You need love, respect, trust, faith, honor from everyone but you will not give anything to anyone and you will feel proud to be a selfish.

You are keeping this in your heart as grudge? Or just informed your husband that this hurts you more and not telling the real thing which hurt you more? Even now I am thinking positively that she don’t want to say the real hurt to him. That is called as love.

Now I returned the gift to you, I don’t have any rights to scold you, please forgive me, I was wrong because it was your father and you know what to do, I am sorry for scolding you. Whether you want him to live a long life or to suffer with pain is your responsibility. I don’t care who is he – I can’t say this because he is in my daily prayers as your father itself.

This is my heartfelt apologies, because I scolded a stranger and who doesn’t mean anything to me. I can scold a friend, daughter, sister, mother, father, brother or any relation but I am not supposed to scold a stranger

Will you be HAPPY NOW, I want you to be happy always. BE HAPPY…

Knowingly – I gave this Pain to you.

Love is so lovely feeling when it is shared with a right person, who enjoys it. Love makes people so vulnerable.

Unlike you, I have not shown my love to hurt you or it is just a symbol of care and concern only. I will write separately why I tried to hold you because the world should get the clarity and I have to get the serenity. I didn’t do anything purposely to hurt you till 3rd January’2013.

I came to UAE for my visa renewal process only and I didn’t come either to see you or purposely to hurt you. I decided to give up my love when I realized that you acted well on 2nd Dec’2012. Neither I felt love in your eyes nor did I feel so happy in that gift. I really took that because you said it is from your mom.  I was betrayed with your crocodile tears. I should not have seen you on that day itself. As per my plan, I should have given the ring to you through Anantha…

If I would have given the ring on 2nd December at least I would not have written a dirty note to you. After reading a lot about Islam and the punishments for hurting others knowingly only I gave that to you. Because I didn’t hurt you knowingly, you said you have done everything knowingly to get more love from me.

I don’t know in that one month what all drama’s happened in your life, but whatever I heard from my friends about you were disgusting. I was really shocked and I was beaten by hammers by each and every one.

By giving one more gift, you created a huge gap in my heart because if you would have bought it with real love, you would not have deleted my ID. If you would have bought it from your heart as a gift for my birthday, you would have called me on that day not as a first call at least as a last call. That call means a lot to me not your fake gifts. Even then I didn’t give up and it was my mistake. After that also how you can use the fake words…….

Everyone asked me has she called you? I said I didn’t get her call. Do you know how much painful it was? You will not know because neither you have shown real love nor seen real love.  I was feeling ashamed of you because how a person can be like this. When Anantha asked me, how you are bearing it, I said all the wishes from all others were like my condolence’s for me. I was not able to celebrate it in spite of being at home.

I wrote a lengthy note and definitely you can’t take that pain and I made everything as cut short and gave a little note only. It is not to hurt you, but to make you understand what kind of pain you have given to the people around you. But you will not know it because only people with feelings will know it. You are just arrogant female who will never know it.

I lost faith in you and I started asking my Sai, Shall I ping her, I got NO only, Shall I send a mail to her, I got No, Shall I inform her that I am going to come to UAE, I got No. When I was in UAE, Shall I call her I got no, I myself got a doubt whether I wrote Yes/No or only No. When I asked to send the gifts with note, I got yes and even I got a blessing as well, whatever has to happen will happen and it is as per your destiny. It was god’s Decision and I believe in him.

I avoided his decision once in Mar-12 and paying the price now, When you disconnected the call and said your brother came, that time I got deep hurt and pain. When I asked him, Shall I talk to her, I got No only. But I tried to keep up the relationship without thinking anything.

Whatever Apologies I have asked to you from week1 were not to show that you are great, to show that I want you to learn to say sorry’s even if you are not wrong, because saying sorry is going to keep the other heart feel that they are the one who has done mistake and you give importance to them to keep up the relationship.

I don’t know in less than one year of time how many sorry you would have said, but nothing from heart. If so I don’t need to write my painful stories with you.

Normally I showed my attitude and I showed my real and true love from heart. I didn’t change it even 1% even after knowing your attitude. Then I realized that I have to show what you deserve only to you. I stopped to ping you. It was really painful. I lost 5kgs of my weight, not because I didn’t ping you, because my love succumbed inside me.

Only the way you reacted and the gap what I tried to give from my side, made me to realize that holding you is waste of time and I have lost few good months by holding you. I am not like you to sit in the bedroom and dwell in my dream-world.

I am a creator and I love to make people Happy, Smile, bring in some Joy, Happiness in their life. That was the mistake from me because why I have to try the above with you. I tried the same with my best friend, I don’t have any hurts because of her. I know that she is like that, she will not say to me anytime that I am showing my REAL Color to you, because she is showing me her real color from Day1.

I have given some pain to her because of your reactions. I have shown all my anger of holding you to my family, kin & kith, friends.

One thing is for sure that I should not have shown any love or care of kindness towards you because of your basic attitude itself. When I got hurt for the first time, I should have let you go. Holding you for nothing was my mistake.

God only gave me the instinct and I don’t know why he gave that instinct to me, whether to make me to feel that I will get only this kind of daughter if I go for adoption or to make me feel for the one I lost in my early stages of my life. I have not felt bad for anything in my life other than loving you.

Unknowingly or Knowingly Pain

I really don’t know whether I said those words to you knowingly or unknowingly. I didn’t mean to hurt you, but out of hurt and the pain, it came out of my mouth. I really felt bad for saying it to you. I didn’t say that you should not have kids and I said first learn what is love and let the kid not suffer with you. It is out of frustration only. I didn’t feel bad because of uttering those words, but I felt bad because I said it when you asked me to pray for you. I should not have said that at that time. Even now I feel only because that I said it when you asked me to pray. I don’t feel for the words.

I really meant not to hurt you. I said in ways that “First know what is love and how to show love” Don’t give the pain to your kid or don’t make the kid to feel for mother’s love. When you don’t know what love is, how you can show motherliness to your kid. I know the way you used to repel for each and everything. You will do with your kid also. But I said it because of the pain what you gave to me.

Having kids is not a big deal, but to be honest, I sent a message also to you that if I die now, I will be born as your kid again. After your husband’s call, only thing came to my mind is why I should get a mother like you, when I have a lovely mother for me and this made me to stop thinking about killing myself. If I commit suicide, it is a curse and I have to suffer in my next birth. Already I suffered by thinking you as my kid. I am facing the punishment and I myself know how wild you are and why I should get you as my mother? Just to make you happy to have a kid, god will give someone else. Why I have to suffer in my next birth as a kid to you na?

Why should I suffer in my next birth also? I thought that it will be a blessing for you to have a kid, but it will be a curse for me, if I die and be born as a kid to you.

All kids are to be born as blessings to their parents but time will decide whether that kid has got a wonderful parent or not. I am blessed in this birth and I don’t want to give any pain to my mother whenever I get hurt or want to commit suicide, I will think that how bold she is. I am blessed with a good mother, with good deeds, with good people around me. I will not die for a silly stupid female who doesn’t deserve or who has not done that much to feel for her or to die for her.

I have some special people in my life, for whom I want to be born as a daughter. Already you are the biggest mistake of my life and why I have to take it to my next birth. I have some wonderful people to come with me in all my births and definitely you are not one among them.

A Stranger is always a stranger. Neither I know much about you nor I wish to know in future. This is my heartfelt apologies, because I scolded a stranger and who doesn’t mean anything to me. I can scold a friend, daughter, sister, mother, father, brother or any relation but I am not supposed to scold a stranger.