I never expected that I will get a chance to work again in Abu Dhabi or I will have the heart to roam around Abu Dhabi. I have the best feelings, best friends, best memories but few of the worst happenings made me to feel that I stayed in this place for 3 years and I forgot everything about Abu Dhabi.
My life was beautiful in that building and the moment I left someone grabbed all my happiness along with her. There are some people enter you life for a reason, for a season and for lesson. I don’t what I learned from this person, but even now it is painful but lovely and beautiful.
I lost everything for couple of months and it was very difficult for me to get on to toes with that pain. I will not curse even my enemy to have that pain in his life. If god has ears, he will not let anyone to suffer like that.
In the last 2 years I have been to Abu Dhabi, maximum of 4 times and all the 4 times, I had to say that I was in a feeling that I am entering to my graveyard. Most of my friends used to say that you dont need to come to Abu Dhabi.
New Client, New place, New friends, new routines, new memories – I felt that I was totally out of my grief and pain. I was able to smile like before. I was able to walk without any tears. I was able to go for shopping. I avoided to meet the Abu Dhabi friends. Once in a while I used to call my best friend and we used to discuss on the current routines and family and end our call.
Life is beautiful and I always love it and live happily. I am of a person who can say that I am happy even in tears.
All my friends from Dubai were feeling so happy because you are going to the place which is heaven for you. It was heaven for me but they are not aware that I was feeling it as hell. I could not tell anyone that I am not happy to move to Abu Dhabi.
When I entered Abu Dhabi after a year time, I went to my previous client to meet the old friends. It was such a painful moment for me and the memories started rolling in my mind. I told my friend that I will meet him near that building and I was not having the heart to enter the building. Somehow somethings made me to enter the building.
One of my colleague saw me even before my friend meeting me and I was forced to tell him that I will meet him in the office. I could not recall that I was working in First floor. I have spent close to 2 years in that place and I am coming after 2 years.
When my friend told, we will meet him in first floor, I was not even feeling that we all were there in first floor. After going to the place, I recalled that I was working and was feeling like how many meetings, how many bottles of water in anger, how many phone calls, how much happiness, how much irritations, what all the pains I have gone through in that building. If the walls has eyes, that also will shed tears.
As long as I was in Dubai, I was not thinking about any incidents that affected me or touched my heart. But the moment I entered Abu Dhabi, my pain started and the way I entered the building, I was forced to see the entrance, where I saw her at last, who was not ready to see my face or to say a hi to me. (05th January’2013 I was brutally killed). I entered the building with a brave heart.
How can I forget that I was in First floor? How can I forget that all my users were in 6th floor. Only thing I remembered was that IT team was in fourth floor. Suddenly I remembered that project was my baby and I could not stop the feeling what I had for it.
Above all, when I went to that particular floor, yes I went there after 2 years and I was asked by DD to come there to meet all of them. I was not able to tell her that I don’t want to come there. I can’t see the one whom I wish to see. Even now I could not recall what was her extension number. I was able to smile with everyone and be cheerful as I was during my initial phase of the project. I didn’t throw my sight to the place where the person whom I miss used to sit. I was not having guts to see someone else sitting in that place and also I don’t want anyone else to feel my pain.
When I came out of that building I was the happiest person irrespective of missing someone whom I still love in the same manner. Life is all about giving love and I have given it to a wall, not to a human and it was my mistake.
One of the worst part of my Abu Dhabi second innings is, the moment I entered, I started feeling for her, but I really don’t feel that I miss her, because I know she lives in me. No can steal that from me or no one knows that my day and night starts and ends with the feelings for her.
What is more painful in Abu Dhabi…. will continue…….