This article is especially dedicated to the women who made my life so bright. It will look little sarcastic at this point of time, but it is really a sincere dedication because for giving the wonderful feeling of life.
Hey Its your 4th Anniversary, a happy time and am not nearby you to say Happy Anniversary my dear. I am really happy that you completed 4 years in one company because I feel that you get bored with people very soon. But at least that company has given you the pleasure to be with it. May god bless you. Last year I was not aware that this day was your anniversary, but this year you are not interested to get wishes from someone who loves you.
I started this article to post it on Women’s day but that would have been the sarcastic post. Since I remembered that anniversary is coming, I thought let me post it to wish you almost in virtual.
Hey I remember, that first days you told me that you were telling about me to your husband and he told you that “He wants to see some changes in you because of me”. Tell him that I too failed like all others. I accepted my failure to you and started to move on.
None of the contents are exaggerated or unrealistic and most of my readers/friends were feeling happy for sharing my feelings, but all were painful stories and even the pleasant memories turned up as painful stories. But these painful stories I have taken all of it as pleasant because nobody in the world can give me this much happiness and for that pleasant moment, let me take all the pains as pleasant memories.
Through stories of the real people’s lives, we explore our life transforming, healing potential of touch and through psychotherapy. When I started writing, I was in deep pain, but I came to know that the more I write I was able to feel relaxed because venting out is a kind of meditation.
Whatever stories I have posted in my blog are excerpts of real cases and a realistic happenings or happened things in my life, emotional reactions. I can’t lie and I can’t hurt someone with lies, but I can hurt you with the truth. Always one’s pain is another’s gain and explaining my pain and the way I got hurts will hurt you.
All of us are voyagers on a life path back to completeness. Some will try to complete their life in 20’s and some in 30’s some in 40’s and some will never try to do it. Here the complete means meaningful and not the death. Death will come only when it is destined to us.
I can think many more as my kids, but I will not be sharing that feeling with them or I will get an aversion of pain ahead of my love and care for them what you have given me. When I speak to Vandana, She used to say that don’t think that I will do like her. Her name meaning may be unique, but she is not unique, but I will show that I am not like her. I can make sure that you will not get hurt because of me.
My SAD You gave me the comfort to share it with you and I have to dedicate this for you. Whatever pain I have got from you is all because of the comfort what you have given to me. I have to go through this pain all through my life for accepting and sharing my love to you as my kid.
Love Me, Touched Me, Healed Me
This topic is nothing much great but I am going to share on this because it is not easy to do all these three by one.
Love happens with someone, touching happens with the other and the healing happens with the divine touch of god only through someone.
I mean to say that we love someone, get hurt by them and touched by someone else to get cured from it, through the healing power of god.
Love me for who I am is the normal saying but I love you for who you are and not for what I got an heavy punishment from god to you, but sometimes even if you love someone with their bad attitudes, they will not understand your love. I accepted the way you are and you failed to accept me in the way I am.
Love is the greatest and heavenly feeling if it is shared with right people. Love is patient, kind, unyielding, enduring, committed, dedicated and unwavering. Love doesn’t give pain and it overcomes all obstacles. But what most of us have called love, our human concepts and humanity is to love and care for others, ownership – feeling the other person like us.
If you are selfish and what is in it for me attitude or with self-consciousness, insecurity, doubt and emotional upheaval. True love, unconditional love, a higher state of love, is limitless, boundless, and the maximum creative power of the universe but is not possible with one person. Everything can be given only if the other person accepts it without any self-feeling.
Love – you are the one who can say that I will accept it when I feel like accepting. I am not selling it, so as you can buy it from me.
Touched me – Those who touched my soul for being the way I am and I was given a chance by someone whom I love to understand that I am being touched by so many wonderful men and women’s in my life. I hope my friends knows the difference between the love and lust.
This touching has nothing to explore our own bodily sensations, needs or lust, cravings, desires and pleasures. This touch is the touching the soul and not the external/ physical touch. It is the touch by the feelings and the way you touched with Love. I can’t feel it so much without your touch. Even now I can’t accept that it is acting by you, but if it is real, it will not vanish. How could you act so much perfectly to make me feel that it is real?
Our personal thoughts, beliefs, attitudes, memories and dreams shared with me in a different ways to give the healing and loving touch, the most profoundly sensational touch, touch that you all brought to have the smiles in my life and most importantly not ignoring me for the way I was feeling, caring or showing my love for the other woman.
Most of the time I focused on my problems thinking the possible causes, recalling in detail the many ways which gave me that I have done all the mistakes and I felt that I was wrong.
I was not able to heal myself was not ready to focus towards healing and letting her go, and moving toward creating what I truly desire. I felt like I have only one hold in my life and letting her go will make me to feel am dead.
Yes it is true to great extent, but before her entry I was living my life and I have not spent so much time with her in person. It was only virtual and even now I can have her in virtual. This time I don’t need to communicate with her virtually but still I can communicate with her as she dwells in me and she is not ready to go out of me.
The butterflies were not flying in my heart but I felt it in each cell of body when it is for you. The love has a special touch and the way you gave it for me, it is really touching.
Main reason is I was in a different dimension and the way I got betrayed was totally affecting my ambition, career, life fulfillment and because of a small change in my personal life, it has given a very bad impact in all the hemispheres of my life. Since I gave her the name as my smile, when I smile a drop of tear touches me. This is how you have touched me.
Totally devastated from all my dreams, goals, achievements and whatever I have gained I lost everything because of one betrayal.
My dear friends, all of you will be reminded, over and over, to bring that touch back in my own life, so that I can fully feel the healing and loving touch with all your support and with others friends as well.
Healing happens to us the moment we are ready to get healed only. Healing happens in every moment, in every cell and organ of our body. Healing in betrayal by your love takes long time, it is very difficult to get healed with others love. We know that it is not destined and we should not cry for the one who entered our life and left without any reason. If someone leaves with reason, it is little easy to take the pain but someone leaving without a reason or without even letting you know the reason is kind of living in a hell. It is stupidity of heart and mind longs and feels for the love which made us to feel our life as miserable.
Thanks for those who shared their Love, touch and for being with me and those who touched with love, I feel that I am healing. I will but the scar will stay till my death.
Thank you very much for the wonderful hearts who supported me in the process of healing, I discovered the truth, to face my inner spirit, and I begin to know my connection is not limited to one soul.
I know for sure that I missed so many golden opportunities to be a healer to others in their problem as I was dwelling in my sorrow. It is nothing like someone died leaving me all alone and I can’t even feel that much pain even if someone I love the most dies also, because I know that is the fact of our life. Birth and death are not in our control, other than the birth and death everything is in our control.
What we believe about healing, how we have healed our self and others, I have not given the chance for many people to make me heal because I know for sure that I will get lost with them again and I don’t want to create any more bonds with anyone. I was thinking too much on healing in different forms with smoke, with alcohols, our intimate relationships, our sexuality… but none of it would have worked…
I know for sure all the above will give me some relaxations but it is not the permanent cure for my sickness, because the sickness is not in body, it is in my heart and mind. Both don’t need any of those. I just need to give the time to heal myself.
Still for those who were behind me in my healing process, I thank you all for the beautiful love, touch and healing therapy from you all.
Holy Prophet Muhammad al Mustafā (S.A.W.W) said:
“Three things ruin man and three things save him. The three things that ruin man are stinginess, following selfish desires and conceit. The three things that save man are fearing Allah (s.w.t) in public and in private, moderation at times of affluence and poverty, and being just at times of anger and contentment.”
[Reference: Mishkat ul-Anwar, Sec 8, Chp 4, Hadees 1826]
This is common in all the religion and I wish someone to follow it whole heartily and pray sincerely to the almighty to give that serenity to you that when you bow down, let it be with a sincere heart and true love and honesty in your mind. May peace be with you all through your life. Amen